As I get deeper into the book, I find it increasingly difficult not to hate Amir. What stops me from really hating him is the fact that I know I could never hate him more than he hates himself. When Amir is deciding whether or not to help Hassan in the alley, he says, "The rest of my life might have turned out differently if I had." Amir is writing this 25 years later, yet he still thinks this was the decisive point in his life. Even more importantly, Amir starts the book by saying, "I became what I am today at the age of twelve, on a frigid overcast day in the winter of 1975", which refers to the night he watched Hassan's rape. This moment has haunted Amir until this point, and he believes it will define who he is for the rest of his life; therefore, I find it difficult to resent him because I know there is no one who wishes he would've made a different decision that night more than he himself.
I do not blame Amir for wanting Baba's love because that is what all children want: unconditional positive regard from their parents. Amir has no mother and a father who is ashamed of him. Though he lives a life of wealth without wants, he is miserable. Hassan, on the otherhand, has nothing, yet he is content. I think this is what Amir hates the most. According to socioeconomic standards, Amir is supposed to have the better, happier life, but Hassan, who is technically his servant, has everything Amir wants: athleticism, a father's love, inherent wisdom, and most importantly, Baba's approval. In this way, Amir sees him as a threat. What Amir doesn't see is that Hassan cares about Amir more than anyone else in the world, and would do anything for him. Hassan loves Amir, and I know Amir loves Hassan as well, but Amir's desire for Baba's approval overpowers his love for Hassan, exhibited by the incident in the alley. I do not blame Amir for wanting Baba's love, but I cannot forgive him for what he did to Hassan.
No comments:
Post a Comment