Alexa Ferrer pg 60-100

            The only thing worse than reading the scene of Hassan’s rape, is reading Amir’s reaction to it. The way he tried to justify his actions was completely disgusting. First he recognizes he is a coward, which is obvious. Next, he tried to justify his abandonment by convincing himself that Hassan is the price he has to pay and his sacrifice for what he really wants in life. However, that is not what got to me the most, because although these thoughts are awful they are real and no matter how horrific those types of thoughts are a reality. What got to me was when he analyzed the kite for rips. That thought was not the thought of a coward; it was the thought of an asshole. Amir’s character is selfish and repulsing.

            “Everywhere I turned I saw signs of his loyalty, his goddamn unwavering loyalty.” This line represents his karma, which is probably worse than any punishment Assef could have given him had he stood up for Hassan in the alley. One would think things would be the other way around and Amir would be kissing Hassan’s ass. It breaks my heart to see Hassan stay loyal and try so hard to get Amir back. I wish he would understand that not everyone is so authentically good like he was; barely anyone was. The scene of Amir’s birthday was hard because of all the attention Baba gave to Assef and Hassan serving him. I wonder if Hassan is still as traumatized as Amir is about the whole situation, because even though we as the audience know Hassan, how can we know what he is thinking or feeling?

            Even though Amir deserves to feel horrible guilt for what happened and how he failed to react to it, I can’t help but feel for him too. My anger changed to empathy when his father dropped him off at school and drove away without saying goodbye. I remember when I was little if my parents and I got into a fight and they dropped me off without saying goodbye, I would spend the whole morning either crying or trying to stop myself from crying. It was a small sentence but I understand the feeling when all he craves is his father’s affection. I cant think of a way for Amir to cure the emptiness inside of him because I think it’s too late to fix things with Hassan. He has dug himself into a big enough hole and I feel like his pride won’t let him climb out of it.